He was there for her after she went home. For a while, her old friends from church, including Lilah, were, “So sorry,” and wondered, “Why didn’t you just call me?”
I’m trying to be grateful. Not because I’m some wellspring of gratitude, but because things really could be worse.
Part of him wants to turn away, to cover himself. But for once, he feels no shame around her.
He sighed, hating the way his mood tried to plummet. But he wouldn’t let it.
The familiar sense of anger, confoundment, and betrayal rose up in him again, but he forced himself to focus on his goal.
A Gift for You
If only she could go up to that idealist, so much like her and yet so different, and scream in her face:
At first, he felt nothing. It was peculiar. Usually, he felt so many things that he couldn’t number or contain them.
And I’m here. When I don’t believe that it will happen for me, I will believe that it will happen for you. When you don’t believe, I’ll believe enough for the both of us.
Week 1, Day 7
I’ve felt satisfied and fulfilled, and frustrated and scared. Today, I was hit with a powerful burst of longing for the life I used to have. Mostly, I’ve been tired. It’s been hard getting used to sleeping in the cold, and even though I’ve managed to stay quite warm under the blankets with layers of clothes, it’s never easy to poke my head up into the frosty air.
So, I spent my first night back in the city, and I feel more motivated than ever to change my situation. The only Airbnb that I could afford for the week is an absolute disaster.
Not about to give up an opportunity to show off his excellent dance moves, he tugged on Lilah until she came with him.
One More Hit
Ben barely touched her anymore, looking at her like she was made of exquisite glass, with a mixture of awe and trepidation. The few times they’d had sex since he found out about the pregnancy, she was certain he was holding back tears.
The Meaning of Love
For weeks, she’d been tamping down her panic, telling herself that she wasn’t going to let anything ruin this for her. This was the one. This baby was the one she had prayed for when she was a child. And she wasn’t going to take a moment for granted.
An Unexpected Visitor
It was quiet now. Holding her breath, she peered around the corner, and despite her best efforts and preparation for the worst, she was so wired and strung out from all that had happened yesterday that she couldn’t help but scream when she saw the hulking mass of man on her couch. Without thinking any further, she fired.
It was the one question she hadn’t dared to ask. Whether he had stayed with her because he felt he owed her some sort of debt of gratitude. She thought she couldn’t bare the answer to that one, even if her motives had originally stemmed from that guilt.
Angel of Music
And before Ben knew it, he had all the cables set up, all of the inputs patched into the soundboard, and was equalizing the audio while the band did a soundcheck.
She looked up, and he saw the glistening sheen in her dark eyes. “You saved me.” She hugged him, reached around to stroke his rough, naked back.
We Interrupt this Program
He tried to come toward her, and she stepped back, watching him carefully to make sure he didn’t try to pounce. Though she had gotten better under his tutelage, she couldn’t match his litheness and speed in a dress.
He couldn’t quite see the colour in Fletcher’s eyes, but he could see the path they took from his hands and then back up to his face. Quite without meaning to, he touched the side of Fletcher’s jaw, intrigued by the stubble there. And then, also without meaning to, he leaned forward and brushed his lips there, until he found the spot he was looking for.
Let’s Give ’em something to talk about
She could feel her resistance crumbling, her will bending toward his, her heart absorbing his words. She fought harder, not knowing why she didn’t just leave. Walk away. Then there would be nothing to argue about.
Love Languages? – Conclusion
I hope that we can build relationships with others where love can flow freely. By understanding when people are trying to love us or trying to ask for love, we can probably clear up a lot of the backlog that causes people to try and take that love by force, or force it on others, which is part of the cause of abuse.
Love Languages? – Gifts
Don’t get me wrong, I loved receiving gifts as a child. I loved birthdays and Christmas mornings and opening up the packages. We sometimes even got Easter gifts. I loved trying to find gifts for friends and family that they would like. We occasionally did Operation Christmas Child.
Love Languages? – Physical Touch
ouching can be more complicated than the other love languages. It’s the opposite of something like acts of service or gifts in that it brings you more up-close-and-personal with someone else. It’s a lot harder to go stealth with this love language.
So I wonder, does God see only the fiftieth time that I’ve messed up that day? Does He hear my cries when my heart can’t take it anymore? Does He hold my dreams as tenderly as I do? Does He look at the efforts I expend to try and make the world a better place and smile? The same way I smile when I see my son doing the same?
Red Light, Green Light
“It’s about fun. Safety. Becoming someone else, for a little bit, using the darkness and pain to bring someone else pleasure. It’s like, the ultimate middle finger to everything I grew up with. Letting out the darkness without being seen as a monster…well, except that one time.”
Love Languages? – Acts of Service
I think there are necessary maintenance activities for each love language, but there’s also enhancement activities that really bring people closer. The “tinglies,” as I mentioned. Which isn’t always romantic. It’s that little jolt of love you get when someone really connects with you.
Love Languages? – Words of Affirmation
And yet, I dream of being famous and having accolades and being appreciated by the masses. I dream of having adoring fans who fall in love with my work and tell me that I’ve touched their lives in one way or another. I also dream of having friends who compliment how smart, helpful, beautiful, and integral I am to them.
Focusing on the irritated part of her brain helps to drown out the part that can’t keep from smiling at the sight of a man happily playing with a little girl. She wishes she could send a picture of it to hell for her own father. The only problem will be finding out which circle to find him in.
Love Languages? – Quality Time
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Can Canned Can Can ?
But that familiar old feeling was so strong. Like she was running on a treadmill and giving it everything she had, and still going nowhere. Figuratively, anyone. Beyond the fact that she had come home and since then had literally gone nowhere. It didn’t seem to matter how many hospitals she built, how many orphanages, how many schools. They were drops in a bottomless bucket.