Love Languages? – Conclusion

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It’s likely that in this day and age, you’ve been asked to either read one of the Love Languages books or asked to take one of the tests. If you’re like me, you might have found it difficult and confusing to conceptualize love this way, at the same time feeling like you’ve discovered some long-lost secret about why things go so wrong in your life. There are mixed reactions to these books, but over all I think they are worth a read.

I can’t quote any statistics around this, but I can bet that Valentine’s Day can be considered one of the most painful and lonely times for all sorts of people. Whether you’re a third-grader receiving an obligatory card bought in bulk and signed by a classmate’s mom, a widower remembering the good old days passed, a husband angry that his wife didn’t come home from work to enjoy the surprise dinner he prepared, or one of many singles who feel left out of the whole romance thing. Holidays centred around connection like these can be a depressing time. That’s why we get things like Palentine’s Day or Galentine’s day, the counter-cultural equivalent to Orphan’s Thanksgiving or Orphan’s Christmas. We also have some slight decommercialization movements around this holiday, challenges people to be more thoughtful and intentional with how they show love on this day. People are sick of meaningless acts of love, and want to go deeper.

I hope that we can build relationships with others where love can flow freely. By understanding when people are trying to love us or trying to ask for love, we can probably clear up a lot of the backlog that causes people to try and take that love by force, or force it on others, which is part of the cause of abuse. By learning someone else’s love language, we can make efforts to honour them and really reach them in the way that we want to. We can also have grace for those who are still learning our language and may not ever be fluent.

This Valentine’s Day, I hope you can reconceptualize acts of love to help relieve some of the negative feelings and emptiness that you might experience due to your lack of ideal romantic or even friendship love. Think about what you can do to show love for yourself, not because you’re pathetic and alone, but because you can. And why not? No one can know you as well as you love yourself. If you are trying to prepare for long-term romantic love or even a deep friendship, getting to know your love language and being able to full your own love tank will make you a stronger participant in these relationships. It will reduce a lot of toxicity, heartache, and misunderstandings. Acting in love and receiving love from Christ will multiple these benefits and make you unstoppable, and prepare you for receiving love eternally in heaven. As important as relationships with God and other people are, it is nearly impossible to reach our full potential of love without loving ourselves to the max, which requires maximizing our love relationship with our creator and Saviour. So have fun and don’t fall apart, okay?

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