Empowering people to help each other thrive
Love. Love had taken a hold of him like a vice, just for that one moment, and he hadn’t been able to breathe. He didn’t know whether it was God, and if so, which one. He’d vowed to make amends, and do whatever it took to make himself worthy of that box of dreams. On pain of hell or bad karma or whatever cosmic consequences would hold him accountable, he was determined to change.
hose huge eyes narrowed, and he realized they looked particularly big because of the goop applied so expertly to them that it naturally enhanced her eyelashes. She caught her lip, the same candy-pink as her high heels, between her bottom teeth, and regarded him with a look so unlike her usual haughty poutiness, that he suspected she’d entered a new phase in her emotional development – self-actualization.
Crap.
It was always predictable, the death of hope. To hope was to fall, after all. To love was to kill, and to trust was to die. It started in the eyes, when the attempt to be brave or laugh it off or remain stoic gave way to the tiniest crack of doubt. And then, that glass box of hope would bust wide open, unable to contain the mortal terror that burst forth. Sometimes, when the torrent had slowed to a trickle, there would be acceptance.
“If that’s what God wants me to do, then I’m definitely not going. If God really doesn’t let anyone be lost, then that means that Sean and my grandfather and my father are up there. And I really can’t stomach that, because they deserve to rot in hell more than anyone else. “
She sank her fingers deeper, closing her eyes, imagining the feel of his thick, black hair, his impossibly warm arms. She pressed her ear to the ground near the head of the grave, where she thought his heart might be. She listened, and she waited, but just like in the garden when he’d had that white guitar, she heard nothing. It was just one of a million quiet summer days.
She didn’t remember how she got there, but she knocked on the open door of room 245. Only one bed was occupied. The woman was covered in bandages, and the places that didn’t have bandages were bruised and swollen. She was plugged into almost every wire and tube in existence. Lanie was still staring when Susan’s eyes slit open.
She glared at him, fighting the tears that spilled into her eyes. He looked just like his father. That’s what was different. He looked so much like Ben now that it cut her to the center of her being.
“If you loved him, then don’t do this to him. Don’t throw away the four people he loved more than anything in the world.”
Although I try not to, I can’t help but stare
I know in my heart that I shouldn’t dare
Even to look at an angel like you
An angel so lovely, so pure, and so true
She couldn’t take this lying down. She wouldn’t. Later, when her brain could hold onto a thought for more than a minute, they would pay.
Now, he cocked his head at her. The light grey of his shirt tamped down the brightness of his eyes, darkening them to rainclouds. They were dilating now, and widened with surprised curiosity. “Do you think I’d submit to you?”
Nobody except for Alexandra, who peered around the corner with wide, dark eyes, just like Fiona and Melanie’s, just like Nima and Emilia, just like Sakina and countless generations of de la Torre women. Except real de la Torres didn’t stay stuck in the shadows, not like Zarah.
“Ben, if you won’t let me look, you should let the Chief. Someone has to assess you. Or do you want me to take you to the hospital?” Although McGuinness says it gently, Ben flinches as though he’s been offered a trip to the morgue
This morning, while her other daughters slept, the mother made two shrouds. One for her child, one as a donation for a future corpse. Or maybe she wishes she could use it for herself.
“I think he’s stupid. He doesn’t stop to think about what would happen to him, and he puts the burden on everyone else to look out for him, and patch him up, and save him.”
His introspective mood popped on a sudden, sharp spike of mischief. It was Dre’s turn to take in Fletcher with his eyes. “I don’t think you can handle my kind of fun, Choirboy.”
His lungs were filled with razors. His head was a balloon about to burst. His whole body was agony, and a tiredness as heavy as an elephant lay on him.
She pressed against him, making him moan and kiss her deeper, playing his tongue in her mouth. For a moment, she pulled away. “B,” she whispered against him. “Touch me. I need you to – ”
“The last time I saw him, we had a minor disagreement about methods for disciplining a seven-week old baby.”
“Don’t tell me to calm down!” With help, the man was able to pry his fingers from her grasp. Frantically, she tried to jerk her arms, but they were bound. She tried to kick one of the doctors, but her legs wouldn’t move. Her head was killing her, and she felt like she’d been rolled over by a truck.
The Voice. The one she couldn’t seem to get rid of, no matter how far she tried to run, or where she tried to hide. She would have to try harder, later, but for now, she was just glad not to be alone. Safe in his arms. A temporary truce.
who he was. He was caring, and nurturing. He was creative and patient, and liked to serve. He wasn’t the type who would intimidate anyone, much less be abusive. Much less hurt a woman. A child.
Yet…
It was one of a million casual touches that he’d shared with her and the rest of their friend group over the last few months. Yet, a tiny little warning light flickered in the back of his mind. But he laughed at it. This was Lanie’s best friend.
“Don’t think this means anything, you big oaf,” Lanie muttered from her chair as she huddled in the corner, eying the hulking mass of tubes and wires and man on the bed. Jake had practically thrown her in before and shut the door in her face before she had time to get worked up into a full panic attack. Now, all the helplessness and despair of flying Ben home was coming back. Once again, she had the thought that she could breathe deeper for him, giving him the vital oxygen that would keep him alive.
Get to know Ben, one of the main characters in the Saviour’s Path series. Light spoiler warning. Although Ben is a charmer with a lot of integrity, he has a lot of personal challenges that make it difficult for him to always do what he knows is right. He’s tired hurting those he cares about and just wants to know how he’s supposed to live his best life. Sometimes, he ends up turning to the dark side in ways he never thought possible.
“It’s not a game to me, little one. It’s a very delicate balance. Nothing is unexpected to me, and I know exactly what I’m doing. I know what needs to happen for my plan to work out. But I’m still a dreamer, Lanie. I know every possible outcome and future that could have existed, and I dream of what I would do for my children if they listened to me sooner.” He sighed a deep sigh, and a contrastingly warm breeze rustled the trees around them, and she felt it even through the icy gale. “But, even that dream of Ben growing old with you wouldn’t lead to the best possible future. Of course, I know what you would do, as much as I wished you wouldn’t. I tried to tell you that. I knew the ripple effects would bring about my exact will.”
Daddy will let go of Toto, who will fall with his face in the flowers. That’s when Andre will notice that the back of Toto’s blue shirt is dark like it’s got grape juice on it. The whole back of his shirt has changed colour. Mommy will start screaming in a way that Andre has never heard, no matter what Daddy does to her. The sound will make Andre want to run away as far as he can, and it makes his skin feel prickly.
It was a photo that she didn’t recognize. An extreme closeup of her face, with her hand tucked behind her ear and several wisps of her hair floating out in front of her. She appeared to be surrounded by a gauzy white fabric that partly obscured her. With a soft smile on her face, she seemed to be looking down at something. Confusion filled her.
“When was this?”
“Kid, I’ve been driving all night. Can you let me sleep for a few hours? Can you just stay in your room, and don’t touch anything, and read the books in there? I think there’s a puzzle, too. A couple of them. Read the books, do the puzzles, and don’t do anything else. Okay?”
For some reason, Lilah’s unquestioning acceptance made Lanie’s fists clenched. “You know what? None of this is supposed to be happening. From the minute of that explosion, my whole life has been turned upside down. When my grandfather died, I promised myself I would never, ever let a man control me ever again. I wanted to focus on helping children. That’s it. And I did that.”
Lidi 