Empowering people to help each other thrive
She couldn’t hold it in anymore. A laugh escaped. At his startled expression, another one flew from her mouth. And then she was bent over double, holding her stomach and chortling so hard she could barely breathe. In only one second, he was joining her, the deep melody the most beautiful music she’d ever heard.
He still doesn’t seem to understand that he’s playing with fire, though, and the mischievous glint remains in his eyes. “Have you ever killed anyone?” he asks conspiratorially.
Ever the gentleman, Jake followed her lead, closely watching her and adjusting his manner accordingly. They ate their fill of snacks, watching each other across the table. It had been so long since she’d had company.
All those people. Hundreds? Yet none of them were here. He didn’t get any visitors other than her and Jake. He was making friends with all the staff at the hospital, charming them with his good looks and charisma, but Lanie had the feeling that he would walk through the smoke of those casual relationships too.
Love. Love had taken a hold of him like a vice, just for that one moment, and he hadn’t been able to breathe. He didn’t know whether it was God, and if so, which one. He’d vowed to make amends, and do whatever it took to make himself worthy of that box of dreams. On pain of hell or bad karma or whatever cosmic consequences would hold him accountable, he was determined to change.
hose huge eyes narrowed, and he realized they looked particularly big because of the goop applied so expertly to them that it naturally enhanced her eyelashes. She caught her lip, the same candy-pink as her high heels, between her bottom teeth, and regarded him with a look so unlike her usual haughty poutiness, that he suspected she’d entered a new phase in her emotional development – self-actualization.
Crap.
It was always predictable, the death of hope. To hope was to fall, after all. To love was to kill, and to trust was to die. It started in the eyes, when the attempt to be brave or laugh it off or remain stoic gave way to the tiniest crack of doubt. And then, that glass box of hope would bust wide open, unable to contain the mortal terror that burst forth. Sometimes, when the torrent had slowed to a trickle, there would be acceptance.
“If that’s what God wants me to do, then I’m definitely not going. If God really doesn’t let anyone be lost, then that means that Sean and my grandfather and my father are up there. And I really can’t stomach that, because they deserve to rot in hell more than anyone else. “
She sank her fingers deeper, closing her eyes, imagining the feel of his thick, black hair, his impossibly warm arms. She pressed her ear to the ground near the head of the grave, where she thought his heart might be. She listened, and she waited, but just like in the garden when he’d had that white guitar, she heard nothing. It was just one of a million quiet summer days.
She didn’t remember how she got there, but she knocked on the open door of room 245. Only one bed was occupied. The woman was covered in bandages, and the places that didn’t have bandages were bruised and swollen. She was plugged into almost every wire and tube in existence. Lanie was still staring when Susan’s eyes slit open.
She glared at him, fighting the tears that spilled into her eyes. He looked just like his father. That’s what was different. He looked so much like Ben now that it cut her to the center of her being.
“If you loved him, then don’t do this to him. Don’t throw away the four people he loved more than anything in the world.”
She couldn’t take this lying down. She wouldn’t. Later, when her brain could hold onto a thought for more than a minute, they would pay.
Now, he cocked his head at her. The light grey of his shirt tamped down the brightness of his eyes, darkening them to rainclouds. They were dilating now, and widened with surprised curiosity. “Do you think I’d submit to you?”
Nobody except for Alexandra, who peered around the corner with wide, dark eyes, just like Fiona and Melanie’s, just like Nima and Emilia, just like Sakina and countless generations of de la Torre women. Except real de la Torres didn’t stay stuck in the shadows, not like Zarah.
“Ben, if you won’t let me look, you should let the Chief. Someone has to assess you. Or do you want me to take you to the hospital?” Although McGuinness says it gently, Ben flinches as though he’s been offered a trip to the morgue
This morning, while her other daughters slept, the mother made two shrouds. One for her child, one as a donation for a future corpse. Or maybe she wishes she could use it for herself.
“I think he’s stupid. He doesn’t stop to think about what would happen to him, and he puts the burden on everyone else to look out for him, and patch him up, and save him.”
His introspective mood popped on a sudden, sharp spike of mischief. It was Dre’s turn to take in Fletcher with his eyes. “I don’t think you can handle my kind of fun, Choirboy.”
His lungs were filled with razors. His head was a balloon about to burst. His whole body was agony, and a tiredness as heavy as an elephant lay on him.
She pressed against him, making him moan and kiss her deeper, playing his tongue in her mouth. For a moment, she pulled away. “B,” she whispered against him. “Touch me. I need you to – ”
“The last time I saw him, we had a minor disagreement about methods for disciplining a seven-week old baby.”
“Don’t tell me to calm down!” With help, the man was able to pry his fingers from her grasp. Frantically, she tried to jerk her arms, but they were bound. She tried to kick one of the doctors, but her legs wouldn’t move. Her head was killing her, and she felt like she’d been rolled over by a truck.
The Voice. The one she couldn’t seem to get rid of, no matter how far she tried to run, or where she tried to hide. She would have to try harder, later, but for now, she was just glad not to be alone. Safe in his arms. A temporary truce.
who he was. He was caring, and nurturing. He was creative and patient, and liked to serve. He wasn’t the type who would intimidate anyone, much less be abusive. Much less hurt a woman. A child.
Yet…
It was one of a million casual touches that he’d shared with her and the rest of their friend group over the last few months. Yet, a tiny little warning light flickered in the back of his mind. But he laughed at it. This was Lanie’s best friend.
One part that really struck me like a lightning bolt was when Harlow expressed that if Stone can’t be there for her even when things get bad with her addiction, then he should leave. If he can’t have her back when she falls, then she’s not able to continue in the relationship. If you’re like me, you might also struggle with wondering whether your baggage will be a burden to someone you want to be in a romantic relationship with, and therefore whether you can ever have one. This part of the book really turned things on end for me.
Okay, so what’s the book about? Two lawyers on opposite sides of an environmental protection case have to fight their growing attraction for each other. And I know what you’re thinking. Enemies-to-lovers, right? Except not even a little bit. They instantly decide to get into a relationship, and then must navigate what that means for their opposing cases.
This book is playful and engaging, once you get into it, and I immediately put holds on all the Pippa Grant books I could find. Which admittedly was only four others, so please, library, get more. This is the kind of book that I would love to see on the big screen. Like a twisted Hallmark movie.
“Don’t think this means anything, you big oaf,” Lanie muttered from her chair as she huddled in the corner, eying the hulking mass of tubes and wires and man on the bed. Jake had practically thrown her in before and shut the door in her face before she had time to get worked up into a full panic attack. Now, all the helplessness and despair of flying Ben home was coming back. Once again, she had the thought that she could breathe deeper for him, giving him the vital oxygen that would keep him alive.
Lidi 