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Unfinished

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I sought the Lord, and He answered me; He delivered me from all my fears.

Psalm 34:4

Find what you’re looking for

What makes you afraid? What are you scared of most? For me, I’m often most scared of failure. It’s a pretty common fear, actually, and has a lot of manifestations. It can make you afraid of rejection. It can make you afraid to try, so you procrastinate or just half-ass it and get it over with. It can make you afraid that you’ve missed something so you go over it many more times than necessary. How easy is it for you to believe that God is with you? That he delights in who you are? For me this feels impossible most of the time. I just feel like God is fed up with me because of how fed up I am with myself. If you’re in the same boat, I get it! But God decided, for whatever reason, that he wants us here, and he made that happen. Why else other than love? Okay, so I finished the family tree as best as I could. I gave approximations for birthdays and death days for as many characters as I could, just so that I can use it in my edits. It is super easy to look up a character and change a detail as I go. Later, for fun, I can add more details related to occupation, death, interests, etc. for more and more characters to make a fun little reference in case I end up with any super fans. Or just for myself because I love this stuff. Isn’t this just the crux of what makes our faith different from the others? Isn’t this the pride-buster to end all pride-busters? I don’t know about you, but I run, hide, or drift away from God on a regular basis, I need to constantly remind myself that all the plans and strategies in the world won’t let me save myself. And it won’t all be okay if I let something slide “just once,” because I’m not strong enough to stop the chain reaction. I’m not powerful enough to make my own dreams come true, and I’m not wise enough to make up my own rules. Im not enough, and I would never want to be God, who is enough. Instead, I get to be me in the meist way possible, with Him there to fill in the impossible with His own power. What's your favorite writing tool that has changed your life? Random pick because I can’t just keep posting screenshots of my glorious spreadsheet. But I’m excited because it’s been incorporated!!! Finally I’m all done! Taking a break to really flesh out the storylines in my series was not something I wanted to do, but everything was getting too complicated and I was losing track of ideas and changes. I’ve still been polishing up my favourite scenes and even wrote 1 or 2 new scenes. This is still a cathartic outlet that I come back to whenever I’m feeling some kind of way, and some days I just can’t slog through the systematic spreadsheet activity. But even with a few detours I’m proud of myself for getting it done. Most of the books are even choppier and unintelligible than ever, because the point was just to drop scene notes into the outlines in the best approximation of logic. There’s a lot of of redundancies and things not quite in the right place and things that need to be completely taken out. But this ugly mashup is still a beauty to me because it’s a really significant step in finishing these books. And EVEN MORE EXCITING, Full Circle now has a semi-coherent and 75% complete outline with 31 chapters! That was the only one I couldn’t outline when I planned the other 6 (then 5 then 6) books, but it’s so close to my heart. I’m trying a concept that may be insane but will be incredible if I can pull it off. A delicious meal from @lenachristine_evc. The sauce was delicious and I probably could have just drank it. It's great to have a vegan friend and not have to think about what I'm eating! I don't wanna taco bout it. Technically, this was too much food for one person. But technically, I'm more of a vessel for smoothies than an actual person, anyway. Just a fun little throwback now that summer is coming to the first of many closes. I wish I could just live on the water. Anybody selling a houseboat?
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